Working out

After several weeks off (sickness and pain) I'm back to working out. Well I worked out today anyways. 30 mins on the event training mode on my elliptical and I felt like I was going to pass out. My lungs hurt, my legs feel like jello, and my abs/core is killing me. I haven't hurt this bad since the first time I started working out regularly almost 13 weeks ago. I had planned on doing 30 mins of cardio and then doing some weight training but I just couldn't muster enough strength to get to the weight training.

I don't know why it was so hard to get that workout in today. My health is decent. I'm no longer on antibiotics and yet I really really didn't want to work out. I knew it would be good for me. I would be glad I would do it and yet I still didn't want to do it. I am feeling really discouraged. Being off 3 weeks and then realizing that my weight goal was still a ways off (like another 30lbs!). I feel crushed. Lost. and annoyed. I've made good progress and even while I wasn't working out I managed to stay within 4lbs of the weight I was before stopped working out.

I should be happy about what I've done but yet here I feel frustrated at what I still have to do. On the elliptical tonight as I was breathing through the sharp pains I had to tell myself that I could do this over and over. It worked sorta. I think I just need to re-adjust my thinking and find a way to make this fun and find my motivation again.

This is where I need some help. What do you do when you hit a wall? I thought about changing my music again. I was documenting all my exercise and my food but that got really old really fast and I felt like I was a slave to it instead of enjoying my exercise or the healthy food I was eating because I was concerned about the calories or whatever. So yeah I need help and I'm open to ideas.

19 days later...

Wow, so yeah I haven't updated in awhile. What's been going on with us you might be asking. Well I'll tell ya.

I was sick. More allergy problems and stuff like that. It never ends. Migraines and stomach problems. It's been suggested that I have some allergy issues to glutten maybe and that's why I have so many headaches and stuff. I dunno. Dr would like me to go see an allergist and to run some tests but since we don't have insurance and pay for everything out of pocket we can't do that right now. I would love to figure out what is making me feel so icky but for now I'll just have to make do and try to take care of myself as much as possible.

Todd has been sick with seasonal allergies but seems to be ok with the help of some Zyterc every morning. He's been busy working away at the new Saul Good location out at Hamburg and when he's home we've been working on the yard and going to the library with the kids to check out books and stuff. Todd also just celebrated his 29th birthday yesterday. We had a great time hanging out with mostly family and a few friends and enjoying the yummy food and great cake that my friend Julie made. Check out my photos on facebook. The photo uploader on blogger isn't working for me today. :(

Sam is sick. Yep sick. He hasn't been feeling good for the last few days and we finally took him into the doctor. He has strep. :( Poor guy is miserable and doesn't understand why he can't go to school and see his friends. Doctor said to keep him home and he can go back to school tomorrow (Thursday). He's on some antibiotics and takes tyelnol every 6 hours to help with the pain and stuff. Oh and he's moody. I'm talking major moody. Like crying because he has to wear white socks or has to pick up a spoon to eat crying. Not fun.

Sophia is doing well. She's had some seasonal allergy issues too but seems to be doing great. She just doesn't understand why Sam is so grumpy. She is a trooper though and seems to handle everything pretty well. In fact she's taking a nap on her bedroom floor right now. :)

What's coming up next for us? Mother's Day weekend we get to see my sister Suzanne graduate from Asbury University (doesn't that sound weird to anyone else?) and see my other sister Siobhan graduate from the masters program at Asbury University too! Squeeze in there some dentist appointments, haircuts, and other random stuff, and that gets us to the end of May. I'm going up to see my college roomie and one of my best friends up in Maryland. After that it'll be party planning for the kids birthday's in early June (Sam will be 4 and Sophia will be 2!). Whew. I'm just tired thinking about all that.

Gotta get back to taking care of the sick kid, laundry, and household chores. Hope everyone is staying healthy and is doing well.

Things on my mind:

1. General health and physical well being

*Feeling better after I had a major allergy attack on Monday. It was not a fun experience. I now have an epi pen and have been on a whole round of meds to normal me out. Without having had a allergy test the doctor wasn't sure what caused it but has some thoughts that it might have been the fish oil supplement that I started taking.

* Since I couldn't work out because of the allergy thing I've been trying to figure out what kind of workout goals I want to focus on when I can work out on Monday. I started working out first to be healthy but then shifted my goal to see if I could reach my FDA recommened weight. I honestly don't know if I could even reach that weight but I think I'd still like to see. For that to happen though I'm going to have to figure out how to change up my work out plans to help with that. I also need to figure out how to eat less calories too but still maintain my enough to keep me going. I want to be healthy while doing this.

2. Better communication

* A friend mentioned in her blog about learning how to talk to her kids. She talked about how acknowldging how you feel and how your children feel and verbalizing it makes things easier. What do you know? It does. I did it all day long. It wasn't always easy but the kids seemed to respond better and we actually had less temper tantrums. I can deal with less tantrums. :)

3. church

*Went to church last week with the family and am looking forward to going this week too and hopefully finding out how to get involved. I am excited.

4. activities and ideas for family/kids to do

*Trying to find things for the kids and for us to do as a family. I'm trying to come up with ideas for crafts and activities. Also trying to find some things the kids can get involved in for a long term like karate or soccer etc. Sadly it seems like lots of those types of things are really too expensive for our small budget. Also trying to find a schedule that works for us a family so we can all get our time in to rest, read, workout, homework, etc. I've got one that seems to be working so we continue to see how that goes.

5. job/work/figuring out where I fit

*Still trying to figure out what I want to do or if I should be working in a different capacity than just stay at home mom. I have a desire to be a professional organizer/decorator but know that would mean schooling and work. Besides being a stay at home mom too I feel like I'm missing a part of myself by not working. Trying to figure out what that means and how to find a way to gain that back without creating more problems (like work schedules that conflict with Todd's and means I'd have to pay someone to watch the kids).

Anyways thats some of the things that are going on in my head. Anyone else have things that they are trying to work through? Anyone feeling what I'm feeling about things above? I'd love to hear from you to know I'm not alone in all this thinking.

Easter

Easter was lots of fun. We got to go to church as a family and then went over to the Keeley family house for lunch and an Easter Egg hunt. I of course didn't get a single picture because I was helping the kids find eggs that we were told was going to be easy. lol. It wasn't easy at all and in the end most of the adults were helping the kids find the eggs. Anyways a great time was had by all.

Easter Egg Fun

Blogger is at it again with loading my pictures in reverse order. Anyways start from the bottom and scroll up to see the Easter egg dying fun in order. My mom came over today and we dyed eggs with the kids. The kids really loved it and it was a lot of fun getting to show the kids how to dye the eggs. Mom was great since I could not remember at all how to do it since it had been forever since I boiled an egg or dyed them lol.